Since your wife dragged you to a counselor, you have decided to lay low like a floor. You have not touched liquor in like three weeks, which is eternity in your universe. You have not seen any of your boys, neither have you called them. They laughed at you so hard that you could be blackmailed to attend a counseling session.
You get home not later than 7 pm. You eat what the wife serves, even if it is some lifeless cabbage, to the point of licking the plate. You even help with the cooking. You help Farrah do her homework. You watch news quietly and you are in bed by latest 10 p.m. You do your husband duty with devotion and discipline. You are flawless. Except that you are not, not in the eyes of Carol.
What is wrong with women?
Lately, she knows how to work your nerves. She will look for the smallest reasons to provoke you. I think part of the reason men exist is to figure out what women want. No man ever succeeds.
For instance, when you get home, you have this good habit of taking off shoes and leaving them outside, taking of the sox and throwing them by the door. That little thing boils Carol’s blood like crazy. Every day she lectures you but she doesn’t seem to know that you are a poor student. What is exactly wrong with leaving the pair of socks by the door? Equally by the time you sleep, you have this human habit of throwing the clothes on the floor. But Carol wants you, despite the physical and mental exhaustion to walk down the corridor to where the clothes’ basket is and neatly tuck them there. Yet it is something you can do when you wake up in the morning, or when the floor is full. Or because it is her with the problem, she can as well as take them down the corridor, but she likes quarrelling and creating such a mess with that that you can’t even touch her when she comes to bed.
Wedding vows are overrated. When she married her, you both swore that you will stand each other for better or for worse. But Carol neither can stand you at your best nor your worst.
Even when you just want to chill on the sofa, she will find something to complain about.
“Don’t walk around in your shorts in the house,” she yells at you when you walk around in your below-the-knee-length shorts. Neither can you walk around in a T-shirt. If you eat and you forget to take your plate to the kitchen sink, for an hour or two, Carol will make a scene. If you forgot spreading the bed, because you read somewhere that intelligent and creative people don’t spread their bed, Carol will freeze goods.
Carol is not necessarily evil. But she is too picky, too neat, too organised for a disorderly creature like you. Now, you also want to take to a counselor to tell her to chill and stop taking life too seriously. Otherwise, she may never live to enjoy life as she should.
How do you make a wife spontaneous, lively and easy to be with?